Support the Sleep Impaired!

Inspiration: A friend of mine posted on Facebook an article pointing to the benefits of sleeping longer. As I myself am a rather light sleeper and an early riser, and I feel very much in the minority on this score, I had the idea to write this plea on behalf of the ‘sleep impaired’ people of the world. The intent was to copy the typical style of the calls for action on solidarity causes. I even threw in a few brief references to certain actual real-life news topics.

So you think it’s easy, do you, sleeping in? Just because you ladies and gentlemen are able, with little to no assistance, to sleep continuously from Sunday to Tuesday, you suddenly believe yourselves to be superior? And for us, poor us, who even after clubbing all night and eventually crashing at 5am (windows and blinds closed, alarm clocks off, phones off…) are unable to sleep beyond sunrise, what’s left? Should I expect to see ‘No early risers’ or ‘Down with morning people’ signs popping up soon? Will there be such a thing as the NSF (National Sleepyheads’ Front)? Will I soon have to fear for my life and my safety?

And yet if we can’t sleep any more, it’s not for lack of trying or because we don’t want to. For a time I even worked a job where every month I had to work several night shifts: 10pm to 7am at work, then back home to crash at about 8am, and even so it was really hard to sleep properly for more than 3 hours. You see, I try to fit in, to assimilate, to build ‘good’ or ‘patriotic’ habits, but I can’t. And I’m not alone in this situation. It’s time we took an interest in the fate of the sleep impaired!

That’s why I, on behalf of the World Sleep Impairment Support Association (WSISA), am calling for a mobilization of the masses to defend our community, to implement research programs aimed at facilitating and improving sleep, and to instate integration initiatives. For example, flexible work hours allowing early risers to arrive at work when it suits them, or pre-breakfast deals to compensate the inevitable shift in standard mealtimes. After all, we’ve made remarkable efforts for the visually impaired, the hearing impaired, and even the matrimonially impaired!! Is it too much to ask for a little extra effort for us sleep impaired?

Thanks for your patience and support. To take part in the Association’s activities or promotion, donate or otherwise contribute, don’t hesitate to visit our Website: or call us at 1-800-SLEEP-IN (but no later than 10am)

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